C’mon! What Donchya Like?

I stepped in it yesterday, boy oh boy. I insulted the dear sensibilities of Rolling Stones fans. Now here’s the thing: I didn’t say the Stones were terrible, I merely said I don’t like them much and their contribution to the global pandemic song fest was, how shall we say, consternating? Ill advised? Who sings “You Can’t Always Get What You Want” during a plague? It’s an injudicious move to say the least.

I made matters worse of course because I said they are insufficiently good at love songs. Look. Nothing makes my skin crawl more than hearing Mick Jagger sing “Angie” which I consider to be far worse than anything ever cooked up by Paul McCartney. It’s nails on a chalkboard.

But of course a smart person wrote to say “Wild Horses” is a terrific love song. I reckon that’s true.

Now like anyone I’ve a long list of entertainment acts I flat out don’t like. I don’t like Eric Dolphy. Come and get me for that! Can’t stand Jim Carrey, Tom Cruise, the glib homophobia of Dave Chapelle, Rosie O’Donnell, Kanye, Snoop, Jerry Lewis….the odious Grateful Dead.

C’mon! Put ‘em up! Or better, tell me what you can’t stand. I’ll respect you and you’ll feel better.

The Complicated Evolution of Hope’s Feathers

Disability is to poetry as feathers are to birds. The imagination is incomplete, restless, vulnerable, hungry, often defenseless—the life of the mind is a capacious struggle—moreover the creative mind has a focused super ego. It knows it’s lost something and like a person who experiences a phantom limb the imagination feels its lost arm. Are all poets disabled? In this way the answer is yes. The question that concerns poets with disabilities—real ones as opposed to the metaphorical—is how do we evolve the feathers?

Gertrude Stein: “A feather is trimmed, it is trimmed by the light and the bug and the post, it is trimmed by little leaning and by all sorts of mounted reserves and loud volumes. It is surely cohesive.” This is the feather as a thing acted upon; the feather as reception. And Stein is not wrong. The imagination is trimmed by the quotidian, the fence post, the shelf of importunate books. I like “mounted reserves” quite a lot. One pictures the mounties of disapprobation riding their steeds, chasing W.C. Williams’ white chickens. (I wish someone would chase those chickens, I do.)

Hope is the thing with feathers—Dickinson means the poetry thing though being Emily she tells it slant. If you say “hope is the poem with feathers” you sound itinerant like a lace maker. Why are hope and the poem not the same word? That is of course the question. Why are they the thing? That one we know.

It’s the disability feather poem thing we’re interested in. It’s the feather of disambiguation, the creative mind is not only incomplete it must complete itself. Grow new feathers, the colorful ones, yes the hope. Again, disability is to poetry as feathers are to birds.

And yet disability as a matter of imagination is not an overcoming. Nor is the imagination accommodational. Nature is not so. As it’s part of nature, part of us, the striving for hope is never what we think it is. The poet Larry Eigner whose cerebral palsy engaged his poetics wrote of the sustaining air which is the best term I know for what I’m after:

fresh air

There is the clarity of a shore
And shadow,   mostly,   brilliance

summer
the billows of August

When, wandering, I look from my page
I say nothing

      when asked

I am, finally, an incompetent, after all

Eigner’s wandering is wheelchair travel “outside” the poem but within the poem it’s the life of the mind just as Emerson would have it but clarity (another word for “hope”?) will be indescribable, will require silence, a separation from others, and a recognition of not having quite succeeded in making a feather. The incompetent is telling us the truth. We may contain multitudes but we’ll never describe nature as it truly is.

**

Disability imagination is folded, curly, perceptive and inapparent on the street. That is how it is. That deaf woman, that wheelchair man, the blind walker—all are cunning and imaginative. Those of us in disability studies talk about disabilities as ways of knowing precisely because as rhetorician Jay Dolmage notes, we understand “imperfect, extraordinary, non-normative bodies as the origin and epistemological homes of all meaning-making.” Imperfect and extraordinary are not “of” or “pertaining” to custom in Western thought, though as Dolmage demonstrates in his wonderful book Disability Rhetoric one may peel back the layers of storying and find examples of disability as a generative principle. Or, as Kurt Vonnegut once said, (and here I’m paraphrasing) “a story is interesting if a nun has broken dental floss trapped between her teeth…) Vague or overt discomfort generates all stories. But disability is less of plot and more of mentation when we admit difficulty. Precisely because it isn’t easy, disablement is metaphorically evocative. Precisely because it isn’t easy, disablement is contentious to the body politic which always hopes to ignore or sidestep disability perspectives in favor of limiting narratives—whether we’re talking about a bad novel with a forlorn disabled character or an IEP for a student. Making disability “easy” is to not admit it into either a theoretical or practical arena. Who among us disabled hasn’t been pressured in many a circumstance to say disability is easy? “Oh, it’s nothing,” we say, because the literal, daily experience of disability both inconveniences normal thinking, and because we feel always the implicit demand to project overcoming, which in terms of narrative, is always easy—you kiss the prince, pull the brass ring, you go home richer.

It (disability imagination) ain’t easy street as normalizing practices in speech tend toward the elimination of complexity and what is disability after all but convolution? Larry Eigner knew it and decided to meditate on the matter—normalizing practices frame silence as incompetence. Poetry is incompetence. Disabled poetry ruffles even more feathers.

Confronted with hardened rhetorical choices…that’s the effect of “easy” for the compulsion to say disability is nothing is immense especially in employment where difficulty of any kind is considered inadmissible. The disabled assume a spoiled identity (Goffman) when highlighting failures of access. If they do it frequently they’ll likely be cemented into the overshoes of the “bad cripple” (to borrow the wonderful name of the late William Peace’s blog.)

Hope is the poem resistant to normalizing architectures, drab feathers, and the use of incompetent when describing a decision “not to” speak I prefer the poem after long silence, prefer the non speaking writer’s poem, prefer the poem that validates the complicated evolution of hope’s fathers.

Andrew Cuomo’s Ten Gallon Hat

The racist rhetorics of government leaders around the globe are wearisome since they reflect all the mistakes of the past. A cynic might say human kind hasn’t learned a thing from medical history. An optimist might say we’ve learned a hell of a lot but demagogues are still too numerous to count and accordingly science still gets stepped on.

Fact: it doesn’t matter where a virus originates and we may never know. Fact: the “Spanish Flu” probably originated in Kansas. Fact: international modes of transportation spread illness and always have. We should call all airborne diseases “transportation illness” and call it a day.

But the demagogues say, “where’s the fun in that?” It’s fun blaming foreigners for a calamity while doing next to nothing about it. Donald Trump is having fun. Inciting hatred is his game. Leading the nation requires providing badly needed coordinated governance to fight a pandemic. Not so fun. Not as fun as tweeting.

Trump believes everyone who becomes ill is insufficiently American. If you’re not healthy you’re not a good cowboy. In his book “The Year of the Century” Dee Brown wrote of the yellow fever that swept across the United States in 1876:

“The American pioneer was a healthy individual, or he did not survive. He spent little time in crowds and had few opportu­nities to contract infectious diseases. With the concentration of population in cities, however, epidemics became more common. “Crowd-sickness,” was the diagnosis of physicians who often did not recognize the disease or combination of diseases with which they were confronted.”

He continues:

“Most dreaded of all were epidemics which struck without warning—yellow fever, malaria, sometimes cholera. Many peo­ple believed them to be God’s punishment for the sins of the wicked and resisted them only with prayers and repentance. Physicians faced these pestilences with courage and a sense of de­feat.”

Why does Trump not want to help the governors of populous states? Is it because they’re generally cosmopolitan places and they vote blue? Or is it because they’re not pull yourself up by your bootstraps cowboys? You pick.

Maybe Andrew Cuomo would get more help for New York if he wore a ten gallon hat and spurs?

America, an Adolescent Dream

In dreams things do and do not happen and they are the same. Recently I dreamt that a high school friend murdered a boy at a party—a high school party where everyone was stoned and drunk. The killing happened right in front of us. The dream shifted: the murder happened in secrecy and no one saw it. The dream made it clear the circumstances were equal. The body was disposed of but the dream didn’t show it. Then the dream played out a variant of “Crime and Punishment” for somehow though the partiers were blameless we were coerced into covering for the murderer whose alibi rested on rococo rhetorical vagaries which the cops couldn’t disprove. And the dream went on, the partiers grew up. All of us were stained with guilt by association for something we either saw or didn’t see. It was an American dream. It was about our nation’s complete disregard for human rights and how we look away while simultaneously knowing and repressing the knowledge that our souls are damaged.

Gandhi wrote: “There is a higher court than courts of justice, and that is the court of conscience. It supersedes all other courts.” America has yet to develop an economy of conscience. Ours is an economy all too often built from deferral. We didn’t see the murder. Or we did but we pretended we didn’t.

The talk of sacrificing groups of people to the virus for the sake of the economy is the talk of damaged souls.

Yep. You Go First

It’s a joke I’ve enjoyed for years, imagining the first sentence ever spoken. “You go first,” has always been a favorite. Others include: “poke it with a stick,” and “here, taste this.”

Now as Donald the Great exhorts a stricken nation that it must immediately re-open its economy, well, “you go first” is certainly back in style.

Jennifer Rubin’s op-ed in the Washington Post “The Test for Those Who Want to Reopen the Economy Too Soon: You Go First” is essential reading. She writes:

“Let me suggest a simple test for those arguing for a quick return to business as normal absent a robust testing, contact tracing and quarantine program: You go first.”

Do you remember when Jimmy Carter visited the damaged nuclear plant at Three Mile Island? I’d like to see Trump visit an emergency room in New York City. I’d like to see him on the front lines of the fight with the same meagre equipment and lack of testing that E.R. workers must cope with.

The Trick of Creative Writing….

Once I had diarrhea in Boston’s Jordan Marsh department store.
Once I got lost at a carnival but without diarrhea.
Strictly speaking you shouldn’t care about either circumstance.
The trick of creative writing is to make you care and perhaps even put the stories together.

Can I do it?

So I had to buy new underpants right there in Jordan Marsh. The rest of the day I wandered seasick as any greenhorn. As I fought to keep myself upright and shit free Boston never looked more brilliant, aloof, magisterial, and vaguely hostile—which is to say it looked like itself.

Getting lost in the carnival involved disregard for authority. I’d gone there with my seedy, antisocial high school pals. In the haunted house train ride I hopped out of the car and vanished behind a pasteboard phantasm of Frankenstein’s monster. As I fought to keep myself upright and avoid electrocution what with the cables around my feet I saw how most of capitalism really works—which is to say fetish screams are manufactured with boards and volts.

Morning Ablutions with Orwell; Thinking of Trump’s Pressers

Everything is now a sign which means culture has completed its work. William Gass was the first to point this out and of course he got the idea from Orwell but I’ll give him two points. Orwell got the idea from the Spanish trenches where Stalinism and Hitlerism were rhetorically deployed like eulogies over corpses.

Of course what is culture says Pilate? Continental aestheticism which colonized the American academy in the last quarter of the 20th century (and still resides there in protean costumes) holds the view that there are no facts at all. No empiricism.

“More than any one thing, the ‘Continental’ school repudiates the empiricist view of the a priori: the notion that non-theoretical facts are simply there, awaiting discovery. Of course, no English philosopher really held such an opinion; the work of Berkeley and Hume is more concerned with deciding upon what is factual and what is not, and with the procedures for determining this.”


(Excerpt From: Christopher Hitchens. “Why Orwell Matters.”)

Of the sinister one must say despondency, the very idea that there are no more facts but only ideas about them—ideological ideas—means we get our daily pittance of spoon fed signage. There are cultural constructions on the menu but no hard tack facts.

Orwell, our true stepfather saw it. He didn’t sketch maggots in a notebook as Hemingway did. He wrote “Animal Farm.”

Which is the name I’ve given Donald Trump’s daily press briefings. They are the Animal Farm. “All animals are equal, but some animals are more equal than others.” “The creatures outside looked from pig to man, and from man to pig, and from pig to man again; but already it was impossible to say which was which.” “If liberty means anything at all it means the right to tell people what they do not want to hear.”

Buddha in an Easter Dream

Give the Buddha a penny and he’ll give it back.
Heard it in a dream last night.
Woke certain he’d been with me.

**

My father died on Easter Sunday.
He hadn’t been planning on it.
What does it mean that Jesus had a warning?

**

I want you to understand me. I come from one or two regions beyond the blurry pasture.

**

I write with my wings and my heart hops in the grass.
I can be any age I wish. Today I’m 100 years old.

**

I used to be a large German cheese but now I am a radio.

**

The field behind
spruce woods
Spring night, blue
and close
beside the first
near post
a child stops
and plays kaleidoscopic ballgames
**

We’re here to be good and endeavor for strength. Such proud words. I fail, much as anyone does. Old Ludwig Wittgenstein sounds like my Finnish grandmother: “we’re not put here to have a good time.”

On Believing Tara Reade and Moral Materialisms…..

Terry Eagleton wrote: “Among other more glamorous things, bodies are material objects, and the ultimate objectification of the flesh is known as death.” Thus the incarnate monism of patriarchal politics. A woman’s body is always in situ to be overcome. #TheMeToo movement is not wrong about this. The aim of sexual assault is death, either of the spirit or the flesh. Women’s flesh.

The allegation by Tara Reade against Joe Biden is a serious thing. She claims that 26 years ago while working in Biden’s Senate office he put his fingers inside her against her will. Any person of conscience must not only acknowledge this claim but also recognize the dire effects of masculinist materiality. Did he do it? I don’t doubt her story.

The objectification of the female body, as practiced by men, is in fact death. This is also true of other marginalized bodies. Black bodies and disabled ones are always abstract when the ultimate abstractions are being handed out by the patriarchy which is largely white.

How can I in good conscience vote for Joe Biden if Tara Reade’s account is true? One thinks of Kenneth Rexroth’s great line: “And what is love, asked Pilate, washing his hands….” Do I wash my hands? Hold my nose? Succumb to the variegated sub-rosa indexes of materialism? Do I say some bodies are more important than others, thereby defying everything I believe?

Joe Biden says he did’t do it. As for me, I don’t doubt that he did do it.

As for me, I was pulling for Elizabeth Warren.

We now live in an age of outrageous hypocritical behavior. Objectified materialisms make this possible, even necessitate it.

When I was 14 I was sexually assaulted by a college boy who lived in my parents house. I never told anyone. I was ashamed and afraid. When people say that Tara Reade’s accusations are suspiciously “of” the past or why didn’t she speak up and these are red flags they’re not being honest.

How can I vote for Joe Biden if he’s the Democratic candidate for president?

First, I’ll do it without cynicism. I’ll be voting for Ruth Bader Ginsberg’s replacement on the Supreme Court. Voting for a woman Vice Presidential candidate who will quite possible become the first woman president of the United States. Vote for clear air and water, improved access to health care, a re-engagement with global partners to fight everything from epidemics to poverty.

As Eagleton says: “History, culture and society are specific modes of creatureliness, not ways of transcending it.”

Of transcendence then is this: aspiration.

Is there still a chance I can vote for another nominee? I doubt it. But I’ll vote for anyone who can unseat Donald Trump.

Opinions and Divagations During Quarantine, Part Two

I hate the term “curating”—everyone these days thinks they’re running a damned museum.
I do like crows as well as mint leaves in tea.
Can’t stand most academics who pose as bio-ethicists. Put it this way, they have their thumbs on the meat scales.
The inter-galactic laxative “will” get you from here to Mars.
I once ate strawberries with a 100 year old monk under the midnight sun.
I do like the cerulean atomizations of LSD. I don’t recommend this to everyone.
I can only punish myself if I’m being ethical.
Back to academic bio-ethicists: they never ask who’s paying for their lunches.
I once put roses on Karl Marx’s tomb and then placed daisies at the tomb of George Eliot. They’d run out of roses. I didn’t see how this was possible as there was almost no one in Highgate Cemetery.
I don’t like sun dried tomatoes. Someone has curated them.
I can’t stand Led Zeppelin.