Spinoza and Giving Up on Contemporary Fiction…

If, like me, you admire Spinoza, you’re a problem. Here’s a spoonful:

“Those who wish to seek out the cause of miracles and to understand the things of nature as philosophers, and not to stare at them in astonishment like fools, are soon considered heretical and impious, and proclaimed as such by those whom the mob adores as the interpreters of nature and the gods. For these men know that, once ignorance is put aside, that wonderment would be taken away, which is the only means by which their authority is preserved.”

False wonderment and ignorance. The peanut butter and jelly of American society. Yum yum! Donald Trump is selling bibles! Yum yum! The mob can’t get enough. Spinoza of course understood the role of clergy in the promotion of faux miracles. If you truly believe this then you’re the problem. You’re the problem in almost every group. You’re always going to ask “what’s wrong with this story?”

Ernest Hemingway called this sensibility the “bullshit detector” and he was almost right. He meant that first rate writing uncovers or subverts falsities. But what if the dominant narrative of your age is all nonsense? Americans are intensely attracted to victimhood. Everyone is now an undeserving wretch.American fiction is, nowadays, almost entirely unreadable. Every new novel is concerned with sub-Cartesian victimhood. It is unbearable. Do you understand false wonderment? Three divorcees go to a summer house and while walking through a tangle of spider webs come to understand themselves. The interpreter of nature and the gods is Dr. Phil. Self-help tabloid fluoride is in the water.
Yum yum! I’ll get no credit for saying this. I’ll likely be attacked. And don’t read this as an attack on women writers. Men are equally caught up in the sad victim story telling industry. In fact everyone is caught by the shoelaces with this collective hive drone.

Someone recently asked me what fiction I was currently reading. I’m reading about evolution.

How many burdens do you carry daily?

How many burdens do you carry daily? If I ask myself this question I admit I don’t know the answer. It’s like asking “what should I be doing?” It’s a fool’s game.

Here’s the problem: I carry some baggage because I’m disabled. “No big deal,” says the heart (which I’m told sits reliably in the center of the chest and not to the right hand side as depicted in cartoons.)

The heart is optimistic. It knows it must be. Every pulse beat is optimism.

Now the brain is different. It’s read Duns Scotus and Neruda and Kafka and Hannah Arendt and Frederic Jameson and “Maggie: A Girl of the Streets” and at least a thousand books on disability and who knows how much gloomy nonfiction—so the brain is disposed to contrarian thinking whenever joy comes up.

Alas my brain is more than a little bit like my Finnish grandmother.

Her name was Siiri and unlike her Apple namesake she was gloomy. She couldn’t help it. She was very Lutheran and her husband was a minister during the Great Depression and they’d come to the U.S. to escape hunger and why wouldn’t you become cautionary and somber in the face of a world of gravity and scarcity?

I don’t know about you but I’ll take gloom over despair. I know about this. I have depression as well as vision loss. I ride two horses, one black and the other white. Or something like that. Maybe I’m a shark with two brains: one of appetite and the other of more appetite.

I don’t know as much about the mysteries of consciousness as I pretend.

But I know this: the burdens I carry are the burdens of others.

If the subject is disability, well, I speak up for disabled faculty, students and staff who struggle to acquire basic accommodations both in my own workplace and around the world.

Burden number one: this can make me unpopular. As with racism or misogyny or homophobia the advocate can be characterized as a malcontent almost instantly.

I’ve never completely gotten used to this. The “this” being disapprobation for speaking out against ableism.

I read as much as I can by scholars and poets of color; gay and trans writers; black writers; women writers. And yes, men. I’ve yet to find anyone who’s more deep tissue wise than Walt Whitman.

Last week I participated in a live online town hall discussion about service animals. In the Q &A period several apparently non-disabled questioners asked things phrased thusly:

“Do we have to?”

As in “OK, service animals are legally allowed to enter my space, but can’t we tell those darned blind people where they are to make their dogs relieve themselves?” Or: “OK, a child with a service dog comes to public school—do we have to help that child?” (As if being disabled requires extraordinary extra help; as if a disabled child is a burden.)

I became upset.
I said the following:

“I went to public school before the ADA. I have been told by teachers and school administrators that I’m inconvenient; or worse—that I don’t belong.”

“Frankly, I hope there’s a room in Hell for school administrators where they’ll get to sit throughout eternity with Joseph Stalin, Richard Nixon, and the man who invented the roach motel.”

Then I signed off.

I’ll never not be offended by ableism.

I’ll never sanction the winks.

Just try those questions out if you substitute race or gender or sexual orientation for disability.

How many burdens do any of us carry?

They’re much lighter when we hold them up to scrutiny.

Atheists say belief is childish…

Atheists say belief is childish
The religious say atheists are childish
Children despise younger children
All demean animals
Uncle History
Keeps mum
Like Freud
He knows
To keep demons under wraps
While dinner guests
Were being polite
Darwin saw ghosts
Oh the tragedy of collision
Hegel with his rotten teeth
Everyone guilty
While supping on aspic

Loving history you love avatars…

Loving history you love avatars
It’s the joke that follows
Men who resemble clouds
Women standing in rain
Convincing, empty
At your disposal
C’mon let’s saddle
Jefferson’s horse
Wowee! Look at you go!
Uncle knows all about it
He loves escapes
Milton Hershey
The chocolate King
Selling his ticket
For the Titanic
No life recounted
Is real—okay
But one has to love something
Faces in the book-window
Look hauntingly real
Ding dong! Who;s there?
A box of masks

Aunt History and Her Cat

It’s not likely
Aunt History will get her say—
Her bumbling husband
Owns the manor
Just like pere Karamazov
And just like Karamazov
He’s never at home
Which gives her time to think
Lenin’s wife Nadezhda Krupskaya
Was poisoned by Stalin
“Never eat the cake” she whispers
To her cat
In general
Women allied to history
Watch cats
As they wash their paws

Uncle History loves Hans Castorp

Uncle History loves Hans Castorp
The way JFK loved Margaret Macomber
An unlikely comparison—
Hans, a gentle patient
Margaret, a saucy bitch
Fictional eros
Is not refined
Enter Bacchus
One can lie quietly in the reeds
Or screw everything that moves
Uncle believes in lying low
He explores the ceiling of his skull
He likes how decency
Accompanies certain kinds of death
Kennedy knew he’d die young
Its not refined
Slow or fast
Characters die

Big Men Be Victims…

I’ve never been good at organizing. I could screw up a “one car funeral” as my maternal grandmother liked to say. She never said this of me. I was too young. One supposes childhood gives one an inoculation against incompetence. Which gets me to my question: at what age does the incapacity vaccine wear off? The poet Robert Bly argued American adults have the emotional maturity of eleven year olds. He further argued that television and all pop culture is designed to enforce this. If men, and yes, women are eleven forever than the culture has done its job. I find I can’t be persuaded to abandon this view.

Barack Obama was in fact an adult. He was a neighborhood organizer before turning to politics. I think he was the last fully fledged grownup to occupy the White House. Biden was old but his lack of personal irony made him more of a boy than we generally admit. We have had very few adults in the presidency. You can count them on one hand. Eisenhower, Truman, FDR, Lincoln and Washington—the rest have been boy-men despite their accomplishments. Andrew Jackson? Child. Teddy Roosevelt? Child. No one knows what Calvin Coolidge was. Jefferson, for all his intelligence, was peevish.

This is why as democracies get tired the people want a Big Child to lead them. All tyrants are eleven year olds. You know who I’m talking about. Here are some characteristics of fifth graders: Very sensitive to praise and recognition; feelings are easily hurt; Because friends are very important, can be conflicts between adults’ rules and friends’ rules; Caught between being a child and being an adult; Loud behavior may hide their lack of self confidence; Are moody, restless; often feel self-conscious and alienated; lack self esteem; Challenge authority figures; test limits of acceptance…(see: https://www.seedlingmentors.org/developmental-characteristics-of-eleven-to-thirteen-years-old-grades-6-8/)

Bly puts it this way: “The inner boy in a messed-up family may keep on being shamed, invaded, disappointed, and paralyzed for years and years. "I am a victim," he says, over and over; and he is. But that very identification with victimhood keeps the soul house open and available for still more invasions. Most American men today do not have enough awakened or living warriors inside to defend their soul houses. And most people, men or women, do not know what genuine outward or inward warriors would look like, or feel like.”

― Robert Bly, Iron John: A Book About Men

When I see Putin or Trump I see baby men with toy soldiers. And yes, they feel like victims…