Big Chief Likes Juicy Fruit

The sight of President George W. Bush making his final diplomatic tour of Europe reminds me of Lyndon Johnson’s vice presidential visit to Finland when, among other things, he tossed American chewing gum to the crowds on the streets.

Bush’s rhetoric about everything from the world energy crisis to the problems in the middle east is really nothing more than chewing gum.

Everyone knows this.

He’s "the boy who cried wolf" about weapons of mass destruction in Iraq.

He’s the fox in the henhouse when it comes to human rights.

He’s chomping a bolus of Juicy Fruit alright.

If America is going to be a gum chewing nation from now on, then I’d like to know which flavor our respective presidential candidates are addicted to.

Here’s my guess:

Barack Obama chews "Nicorette" whenever he gets the chance.

John McCain chews Feenamint—"the minty laxative ".