September 2007 – Page 4 – Planet of the Blind

So I went to the local health club and had a long swim and then I went and sat in the sauna. A woman there asked me if I "could see anything at all" and when I said "colors and shapes" then she just went on and on. "Can you tell that I’m female?" "Do you see my shape?"

Godfrey Daniel! I wanted this woman to shut up. I was wrapped in my own private endorphin Eden and I didn’t need this miscreant to ask me about my blindness and for God’s Sake I thought she was going to grab my hand and put it to her face and say: "Can you tell what I look like?"

So because she wouldn’t stop talking I just got up and walked out. It was easy.

She probably thought: "What a miracle, the blind man walking away, all by himself."

People with disabilities seldom get a break. Some days you just feel like Hester with the scarlet "A" on your chest.

Shut up! You! You Out There! Read a book about eye disease. And do it in the privacy of your own home or apartment. Promise yourself that you won’t spoil other people’s hard earned moments of bliss.

Of course the real problem in this sauna was that it wasn’t the authentic Finnish variety. In Finland if there’s a jerk in the sauna you just throw more water on the stones and drive the fool away with hot steam.

This was one of those pale imitation American saunas which is just a hot little room without the all important bucket of water and ladle.

I think from now on when people do this intrusive "do you know what I look like" thing, I’m going to say, "Yeah, you look just like Sponge Bob."

Labor Day is upon us and this means that it is time for the annual MD “telethon” and as many already know, corresponding anguish will be felt by people with disabilities in perfect accord with the emotional appeals that are used by the telethon industry.

I don’t want to persuade people to give up on charity—especially where real cures can be found for illnesses that can alter lives. I do wish that the fund raisers in all areas of disability related work would wean themselves of the old fashioned Victorian language which is dependent on words like “courage” and “inspiring” and “heroic” and the like.

As a person with a disability all I want today is to be a regular citizen. I don’t want to be any more inspiring than the person next door.

Can’t we have medical advancements and good rehabilitative services without patronizing lingo?

The problem is that the treacle of “old charity” really gets folks to open their wallets. Rational discourse doesn’t seem to “do it” and isn’t that kind of interesting?

But we can cure muscular dystrophy and champion the dignity of people who have MD. We really can do both of these things. Why are charitable organizations so afraid to try new and dignifying approaches? Ah, we’re back to the wallet.

Here’s an idea: the donors can bid for a chance to be on a reality TV show in which they must survive by living with the challenges of people with disabilities.

This scenario would provide both charity and comedy.

You may say that I’m a dreamer, but I’m not the only one…

Read Connie’s thoughts in her post on the [with]tv blog: Same Old, same old