When I was really little I owned a toy monkey and an abacus. I don’t know why I loved these two things but these homely items meant a great deal to my formative self.
Nowadays as I walk around in the world of big people I secretly weigh the merits of ideas or occasions against what I call in private "the monkey and abacus test".
Most people have their own versions of Monkey and Abacus.
Do I want to attend a picnic fundraiser for the Rural Sheriff’s Society of Central Ohio?
Hmmm. Let’s see how the prospect of such a thing fairs when the M. & A. Test is administered.
1. Monkey is soft and comforting against left cheek.
(Rural Sheriff’s picnic has no provisions for facial satisfaction.)
2. Abacus simultaneously gives fingers and brain something to think about.
(Fingers and brain must remain sequestered at Sheriff’s picnic.)
I think it is fair to say that the example shown displays the efficacy and utility of "monkey and abacus" and that not much more needs to be said.
I would of course love to hear from readers about your own variants of this secret litmus.
I believe that sometimes in the midst of high tension, what with global warming and the disappearance of Rosie O’Donnell, that we need to return to the basics.
So now I’ve "outed” myself as a monkey and abacus man.
And you?
S.K.
Planet of the Blind 