I’ve lost many friends in this life, some from illness, others from painful misunderstandings. Of the latter I was often responsible. I was hot headed In my youth. Sometimes I wish I could repair past damage but not enough to chase people down. I certainly don’t want to find out that those with whom I fought never developed emotional intelligence. But then I have to ask “how much E.Q. do I have?” This is a bit like asking “how seasick are you when you’re seasick?” I feel better than that man puking over the rail but then again I’m not feeling entirely well.
Certainly I’m lonely. As a disabled child I was always lonely. When I was in my teens I tried to kill myself. I was lonesome in college.
Once in awhile you have to interview yourself. A preliminary question: when did you first realize you were a stray raindrop?
Note: the answer should include what you sensed on the day of your primal loneliness…like Eliot’s objective correlative…I recall as other children mocked me for my blindness there was a blue jay crying out the names of his flock…
Rain journeys road calls bird walks small blind child turns knob on radio…
Planet of the Blind 