More About the Toilet Boys

The toilet pictured below is made by Gerber and its identical to the mysterious toilet I wrote about earlier this morning. The toilet boys came twice today and after installing a new tank they discovered that indeed my toilet looks pink in our upstairs bathroom because of the lighting . Yep. We hauled the various parts into the adjacent room where amazingly enough the toilet parts looked nice and white. But when they are installed in our guest bathroom they turn pinkish like the nightgowns in a Wallace Stevens poem. The toilet boys were quite surprised. They have installed billions and billions of crappers and never before have they encountered this kind of optical anomaly. Meanwhile, in the spirit of fairness I must opine that the toilet boys are blameless. They did not in fact install a pink toity as a means of cutting corners with a blind customer. The damned thing is white in any other room but the bathroom. I have read countless essays on aesthetics. This is clearly a neo-Platonic puzzle. Does the “ideal” toilet change its color in accordance with the light or does it always look the same? Is a pink toilet lighter to carry than a white one? I forgot to ask the toilet boys about this. And of course the moral of this tale is don’t buy a house.  




0 thoughts on “More About the Toilet Boys

  1. Steve, I’ve got to say that this is the funniest thing I’ve read in a while. Having once replaced a toilet myself (yes, from the wax ring and up. Go new homeowner, go!) I’m glad for all involved that it wasn’t your bowl that had the blush. The tank is much easier to replace!


  2. Frank Zappa:
    “Well the toilet exploded yesterday afternoon,
    The plumber he told me never flush a tampoon,
    This great information cost me half a week’s pay,
    And the toilet blew up later on the next day…”


  3. Gosh this reminds yet again what a pain in the ass the American Dream of being a “home owner” is. When I think “Home owner” I do not think romance and watching kids your grow up. I think “building manager” as in broken pipes, toilets, appliances, leaky roofs, painting, driveway repair, electricians, carpenters. All these people in the trades earn more per hour than I do.


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